The Role of the Husband – Colossians 3:19

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Pastor Scott L. Harris

Grace Bible Church, NY

March 20, 2011

The Role of the
Husband

Colossians 3:19

Introduction

It is good to be back. While it is always encouraging to hear good preaching
such as occurred at the Shepherd’s Conference a week ago, Al Mohler was correct
in his assessment that preachers want to preach, and I would just as soon have
been at the pulpit where he was or at least tag-teaming with him than sitting in
a seat. It is a great joy and privilege to be able to study the word of God and
then bring the fruit of that study to you.

This morning we return to Colossians 3 and Paul’s commands concerning
relationships in the family. I found it curious how many commentators wanted to
make this section of this letter independent from what Paul had written in the
prior verses, but it is not. Our relationships with one another are dependent
upon living as those who have been raised up with Christ. Having minds that are
set on the things above instead of the things that are on earth is not about
neglecting the things here on earth. That would result in people that are so
heavenly minded that they are no earthly good. It is rather having a proper view
of life in the present because of having heaven as our destination. (See:
Consequences of Life in Christ
) As Peter so
succinctly put it in 2 Peter 3:14 regarding the promise of a new heaven and new
earth, "Therefore, beloved, since you look for these things, be diligent to
be found by Him in peace, spotless and blameless."
(See:

Motivation for Maturity
)

Proper relationships in the family and in the workplace are dependent upon us
putting off the old man and putting on the new. Each of us are to "consider
the members of
[our] earthly body as dead to immorality, impurity,
passion, evil desire, and greed"
(See:

Mortifying the Flesh,
Pt. 1
) and put aside "anger wrath, malice,
slander and abusive speech."
(See:

Mortifying the Flesh,
Pt. 2
) The old self is dead, so we should quit
dragging around its corpse with its lying and evil practices. (See:

Mortifying the Flesh,
Pt. 3
) Instead, we are to
put on the new man and "put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility,
gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other."
We are to follow the example of the Lord Jesus and let His peace rule our hearts
and be thankful.
(See:
Christian Virtues, Part 1
;

Part 2
; Part 3
Part 4
) We are to let the word of Christ richly dwell within us and
encourage and teach one another accordingly. (See:

Expressing the Indwelling Word of Christ
)Paul summed up his general
exhortations in living the Christian life, "And whatever you do in word or
deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the
Father"
(Colossians 3:17 – (See:
Doing All in the Name of Jesus
)). That command includes everything we communicate
and all our actions and behaviors.

It is on the basis of these general commands to all Christians that He now
gives instruction to the various members of a family and in the work force
starting with the most intimate relationship and working his way outward in
three sets: wives and husbands, children and parents, slaves and masters. Let us
read though Colossians 3:18-4:1 again to set the context.

18 Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19
Husbands, love your wives, and do not be embittered against them. 20 Children,
be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the
Lord. 21 Fathers, do not exasperate your children, that they may not lose heart.
22 Slaves, in all things obey those who are your masters on earth, not with
external service, as those who [merely] please men, but with sincerity of heart,
fearing the Lord. 23 Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord
rather than for men; 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward
of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve. 25 For he who does
wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that
without partiality. 4:1 Masters, grant to your slaves justice and fairness,
knowing that you too have a Master in heaven.

The Importance of Marriage

Paul begins with the marriage relationship for it is not only the foundation
for the family, but it is also the foundation of all of society. If marriages
decline so does the rest of society, and tragically we are seeing that happen in
our own time in our own society. As America continues its flight from God and
godliness, it increasingly promotes sinful perversions and abominations.

The so called sexual revolution of the 1960’s is the direct precursor to the
homosexual revolution of our current times. Both are predicated on the false
basic premise that the "pursuit of happiness" enshrined in the preamble of our
Constitution means that there should not be restrictions on the hedonistic
fulfillment of one’s desires. That those desires are sinful before God and
detrimental to themselves and to society are irrelevant to the mind entrapped by
sin. As hedonistic selfishness gains a greater influence on society, its demands
progress from tolerance, to acceptance, to equality, to superiority.

At present, religious based foster care agencies are under attack in Illinois
because they do not refer children to homosexuals. In other states religious
based adoption agencies and charities have lost their licenses to operate
because they do place children in homosexual homes or hire them. In Canada
religious broadcasters are forced off the air and fined if they quote any of the
many scriptures that condemn homosexuality because it is considered "hate
speech." The fact that homosexuals are plagued with appalling diseases that are
rare in the general population or have a mortality rate in the 40’s instead of
the 70’s or 80’s as the general population seems to be of little concern. The
perversion of homosexuality has moved from being tolerated by society, to
gaining wide spread acceptance, to equality in some states, and now superiority.
Constitutional freedoms of religion and speech are trumped by rights made up by
legislation to allow the practice of sexual perversion with impunity.

We already have already seen from our previous study that God established
marriage in Genesis 3 so only He can define it. We also saw from Ephesians 5
that marriage is to be a picture of Christ and the church, so any advocation for
marriage to be between anything other than a man and a woman is a perverse evil.
Those promoting such perversions need to repent and turn from their sin to the
forgiveness and freedom from sin that is in the Lord Jesus Christ. They are in
serious danger of the Lord turning away and leaving them condemned in their sin
for eternity as explained in Romans 1:18-32.

God is also the only one that can define the role of the husband and the
wife. Those advocating roles different from what He has declared are also
promoting perversion and evil and need to repent. Sadly, there are many
professing Christians that do not fulfill the role God has given them within
marriage either due to ignorance, immaturity or selfishness. It is time for them
to become wise, walk in maturity and become selfless in serving their spouse
according to God’s design. While that will appear to be scary to some, it is the
only way to glorify God and have a truly fulfilling marriage.

I already talked about the role of the wife a few weeks ago, so I will not
repeat that here expect to encourage you to fulfill that role of being
submissive to and respecting your husbands as is fitting in the Lord. If you
were not here or don’t remember what was said, then get a copy of the audio or
text versions of the sermon from either the website or ask for the CD or printed
notes. Ladies, do not fall for or continue in the mindset of feminism that has
had such a negative effect on our society. You can have a much better life and
marriage by living it God’s way than their way. (See:
The Role
of the Wife
)

This morning I am going to address the specific role of the husband in
marriage, however everyone else also needs to pay attention. Wives need to know
how to encourage their husbands to fulfill his role. Unmarried men need to know
God’s expectations if they do get married. Unmarried women need to know what
qualities they should be looking for in a husband if they get married.

The Role of Husbands

Paul makes two commands concerning husbands in verse 19. "Husbands, love
your wives, and do not be embittered against them
." There are additional
instructions in other passages, some of which we will look at this morning, but
these two are contrasting and all encompassing. If the husband will do these two
things, then the commands to the wife will be easy for her to fulfill. It has
been generally observed, and I think accurately, that what women desire the most
is to be truly loved and what men want the most it to be genuinely respected. It
is not hard for a woman to genuinely respect a man that truly loves her, and
neither is it hard for a man to truly love a woman that genuinely respects him.
Those are the very commands God gives to each to fulfill.

However, fighting against this happening in the marriage is the curse of sin.
Men and women are both innately selfish so instead of giving of themselves
freely, they seek to get from the other want they want. But true love cannot be
gained by manipulation and neither can genuine respect be gained through
oppression. Like two leeches they seek to gain life from the other but only
manage to suck the life out of the marriage leaving a shell of what could and
should have been. However, when a husband and wife set aside their old sinful
ways and walk in the newness of life that comes with following Christ, then
there is a basis for each to fulfill their God given roles within the marriage
and God can be glorified in and through them. I cannot stress enough to you
husbands that you must walk with Christ if you are to fulfill your role in your
marriage.

Love. The first of Paul’s commands here is that you are to love your
wife. This is not a reference to either being physically attracted to her or
fond feeling of affection though both of those should also be part of a healthy
marriage. The love commanded here is ajgapavw /
agapaô, the love that arises from the will and sacrifices itself for the best
interest of the one loved. This is the love Jesus has for us. This is the love
that we are to have for one another. This is the love a man is to have for his
wife. This love is contrary to the sinful bent of mankind because it seeks to
give instead of get.

Ephesians 5:25-33 gives further description to this love. In that passage the
husband is commanded three separate times to love his wife. Verse 25 commands,
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave
Himself up for her."
That is complete sacrifice. Until you have died in the
place of your wife, you have not loved her to this extent. That means that every
husband here today still has room to grow in his love for his wife.

Verses 28-29 commands and explains, "So husbands ought to love their own
wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one
every hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also
does the church."
Here there are two examples given. The first is to love
her with the same consideration you give to yourself. Treat her with the same
kind of care you give to your own body, and lets face it, everyone seeks to
treat their body with the utmost care. Even when we vigorously exercise it is
for the good purpose of keeping out body fit. It takes time, money and
thoughtful planning to do all the things that are part of caring for our bodies
– feeding it, cleaning it, exercising it, making it look good, health care for
it and pampering it to make it comfortable. Husband, do you give that kind of
consideration to your wife?

The second example is harder for Christ is the example and His care for the
church is complete and sacrificial. His care for the church is actually better
than our care for our own bodies because He does know what is best while we
guess at that. Yet that is still the example set for a husband to follow in
loving his wife.

Paul also points out the pragmatic aspect of this too. A husband is to care
for his wife because she is part of him. We may not understand all of what it
means in the quote from Genesis 2:24 repeated here in verse 31, but there is
definitely some aspect in which the two individuals have become one flesh in
marriage. In marriage he is part of her and she is part of him. So even from a
more selfish point of view, for the man to love his wife is really to love
himself – as Paul states at the end of verse 28.

Think about that a moment men. Is there anything that you could do for your
wife that would not ultimately come back to you for your benefit? Certainly
there are some exceptions in women that are so self-centered that they are not
fit to live with, but in general, is it not true that if you treat your wife
well, she will also treat you well? If you give consideration to her, she will
also do the same for you. If you lead her in all godliness, she will be a more
godly woman. If you love her as the scripture says here, she will be much more
easily able to fulfill her role in submitting to your leadership and showing you
respect. If you demonstrate sacrificial love to her, she is much more apt to
sacrificially love you too.

Love your wife as Christ loved the church. Cherish her as you cherish your
own body.

Paul’s third command to love your wife is in verse 33 – "Nevertheless let
each individual among you also love his own wife even as himself."
The
arguments here are really the same. Everyone loves themselves. There is no lack
and has never been a lack of self-esteem in the human race. Instead it is just
the opposite. Humans are by nature self-centered and proud. We love ourselves.
The Bible uses that fact as a prod to get us to understand that we need to love
others. The general command given by Jesus in several different passages is that
you are to love your neighbor as yourself. Here Paul applies that directly to
every husband. You are to love your wife as you do yourself.

Let me now give you a couple of examples to prod your thinking about applying
these commands in practical ways.

1) Your wife calls you to dinner and you find that she is actually serious
about making the family diet more healthy, and if it tastes like it looks you
will be losing a lot of weight very quickly. What is your reaction? A) Grateful
for her service to you and care about your health, B) Irritated you didn’t get
something you like C) Making plans to go out and get a burger later

2) You have been planning an event with your friends for sometime – fishing,
hunting, watching an important game, etc. and when the day arrives your wife has
the flu. She looks and feels like death warmed over. How do you feel about the
prospect of staying home and taking care of her and the kids? A) What an
opportunity to prove how much I love her. B) Why is God punishing me? C) Maybe
her mother can come watch her and the kids?

3) Your busy reading the paper or watching your favorite sporting competition
and your wife sits down and says, "honey, I have a problem." Do you A)
Get excited that she thinks so highly of you that she wants your help, B) Want
her to go away and come again some other day, or C) Get a chill running down
your spine that you could be in trouble?

4) You have listened to your wife’s problem and given her a very intelligent
and logical solution, but she keeps talking about it. Do you think: A) Why
doesn’t she just thank me and leave me alone now, B) Uh oh, she’s a bit dense
today or C) Wow, this problem has really affected her. I wonder how else I can
encourage her and let her know that I care?

Gentlemen, to love your wife the way Christ loved the church, to love her as
your own body, to love her as you love yourself will require you to sacrifice
yourself for her. Let me quickly add here that this includes the idea of
protection. You place yourself in harm’s way in order to keep her safe. There is
a price you will have to pay in order to love her in the manner God commands.
You will have to be humble and learn to put her best interests over your own,
but isn’t that what we are called to be as Christians anyway? Philippians 2:3,4
commands us to "Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with
humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than
himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for
the interests of others."

Not Embittered. Back in Colossians 3:19 we also find that Paul
commands husbands to not be embittered against their wives. The word embittered
is pikraivnw / pikrainô. The root of the word
means to cut, prick due to being sharp, pointed. In reference to smell or taste
it is disagreeably pungent. The word is used in Revelation 8:11 in reference to
the waters being made bitter. It can also refer to a sour stomach as it does in
Revelation 10 when John’s stomach was made bitter from the little scroll he ate.
The noun form is used in James 3:11 as a contrast to sweet water, but more often
the cognate forms are used metaphorically in reference to attitudes that are
bitter, sharp, harsh, angry, jealous. Peter wept bitterly after denying the Lord
(Matt. 26:75). Those lacking wisdom have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in
their hearts (James 3:14). The unrighteous have mouths full of cursing and
bitterness (Romans 3:14) and a root of bitterness causes trouble and defiles
many (Hebrews 12:15).

Why would Paul have to warn husbands to not let such bitterness rise up in
their lives against their wives? This command is the contrast to the command to
love. If the husband and wife are properly fulfilling their roles he will not
become bitter against her, but if either fail to do so, then bitterness could
rise quickly. Paul’s command is to keep that from happening.

Even a man that generally does walk properly with the Lord can respond
sharply to the wife he claims to love if he is caught off guard, over stressed
or momentarily selfish. A man who is not diligent to walk with the Lord can
easily turn against his wife and become harsh or even respond in anger if he is
not getting what he wants. That can happen even when she is trying to do the
right thing but is misunderstood, but it is nearly a given if she is
disrespectful or he senses she is trying to manipulate him for her own
advantage. Bitterness may be sharp, but it does not have to expend itself all at
once like anger. It can also burn slowly over a long period which is why a root
of bitterness can cause so much damage. It continues to fester and smolder for
longer periods causing damage long after the initial spark that set the fire
going has faded away. Such behavior ought not to be and so Paul warns against
it. Love should and will prevent it, but at those points when love is lacking or
he finds his wife especially irritating for whatever reason, he is to heed the
caution and not allow bitterness into his life.

Paul contrasts wrong and right behavior and attitudes in Ephesians 4:31-32
saying, "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put
away from you, along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted,
forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."

Bitterness is an attitude and action of the old man and so it should be put away
from you as you walk in the new man. It should not even show up in your speech
much less your actions. You are not even to let an unwholesome word proceed from
your mouth but only such words as are good for edification according to the need
of the moment that it might give grace to those who hear (Ephesians 4:31). There
is no room in the Christian husband’s life for jokes and comments that disparage
his wife.

Peter’s command to husbands in 1 Peter 3:7 is helpful in preventing any
bitterness from arising. "You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an
understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman’ and grant her
honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be
hindered."
An "understanding way" is literally, "according to knowledge."
Your wife is to be your life study. Yes, she is very different from you because
she thinks very differently than you. You both should praise God for that. It is
your responsibility to study her and learn how she thinks, reasons and why she
feels the way she feels. Her reasoning and emotions do not have to make sense to
you, but you do need to strive to recognize them and respond accordingly. Too
often men make it a one way street demanding their wives figure them out and
change accordingly, but it is actually a two-way street with the greater
responsibility placed upon the man. Older women are to teach the younger women
how to love their husbands (Titus 2:3-5), so they do have a responsibility to
learn about you, but the greater responsibility still lies on you men to do
this. Why? Because you are the man and she is the woman who is a weaker vessel.

Feminists recoil at Peter’s statement here that women are weaker vessels and
there is much debate about exactly what Peter means by the statement. However,
Peter points this out as a reality and why men need to take on this
responsibility. I do not think this is a reference to women being weaker
physically. While women generally lack the upper body strength of a man, they
often show much greater physical stamina. Hence the old adage that a man works
from rising to setting sun, but a woman’s work is never done. Like the Eveready
Battery Bunny she keeps going, and going, and going. Nor do I think that this
refers to general intellectual ability since women often prove themselves to be
equal to and sometimes even superior to men in various fields of study. My
personal opinion, for which I think I can make a scriptural case, is that this
refers to her emotional makeup which can lead her astray. Paul states in 1
Timothy 2:14 the reasons he did not allow women to teach or exercise authority
over a man was the order of creation and that it was Eve that was deceived, not
Adam.

The husband then needs to take on the responsibility to strive to understand
his wife and live with her accordingly granting her honor as a fellow heir of
the grace of life. She is in no way his inferior. The husband and wife simply
have different gifts and God given roles.

Leadership – There are a couple of other roles that husbands have in
the marriage that I want to mention briefly this morning. The first is
leadership. Ephesians 5:23 states, "For the husband is the head of the wife,
as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself [being] the Savior of the
body."
1 Corinthians 11:3 adds, "But I want you to understand that Christ
is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the
head of Christ."
The man has a responsibility to lead his wife as her head.
This is not license for him to do anything he wants at her expense, but rather
to take the responsibility to direct his family in the ways of the Lord, for
Christ is his head. Men, you are under the authority of the Lord Jesus Christ
and that is regardless of whether you even profess faith in Him or not. Notice
in 1 Corinthians 11:3 that the statement that Christ is the head of every man
is without qualification. The Lord Jesus is your creator and He will hold
you accountable and judge you for how well you have followed His commands in
leading your family. An additional sobering truth is that a leader has the
responsibility for the decisions made in the family including those made by his
wife or children.

That leadership will encompass many areas of life, but a primary one is
leading in holiness. In Ephesians 5 the example of the love of Christ is that He
sacrificed Himself for the church so that He might
sanctify her. He wanted her to be all that she could and should be, without spot
or wrinkle, being holy and blameless. Husbands are responsible to love their
wives with the same goal in view. He is to lead her into holiness. Husband, what
are you doing in lead your wife into holiness? The priorities and example of
your life will answer that question – your own church involvement, personal
Bible study, family devotions, personal integrity. All of these are part of it
plus your encouragement for her to take the time and be involved in her own
personal devotions and in ministry for the Lord.

Your example is even more important if your wife is not a Christian. Your
walk with the Lord and how you treat her should do one of three things. 1)
Attract her to salvation in Christ. 2) Drive her away because of her rejection
of Christ – again be sure it is Christ in you that drives her away and not you!
3) She thinks you are a fanatic but she stays with you anyway because she knows
no other man would treat her as well as you do.

Leadership also encompasses an element of protection from the physical danger
and moral evils that exist all around us. Decisions regarding even things such
as where you live, the jobs you do, the friends you keep, the activities you
participate in, and even entertainment choices will have major influence on the
way in which you live. If you do not lead your wife into holiness then you will
be leading her away from it, and that will wear even on a godly woman.

Protect her from evil influences by your godly leadership.

Provider. The last responsibility I want to mention this morning is
being a provider. 1 Timothy 5:8 states, "But if anyone does not provide for
his own, and especially for those of his household , he has denied the faith,
and is worse than an unbeliever"
The context of this verse encompasses not
just your wife and children, but also widows in the extended family when
necessary.

Providing is not about how much money you make, but rather about your own
trust in the Lord to do things His way knowing that He is the one that actually
provides. Jesus’ promise in Matthew 6:33 is crucial to being a godly provider –
"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness; and all these things shall
be added to you.
" God will provide the food, shelter and clothing you need
and by which you should be content if you put Him first. And remember that 1
Timothy 6:8 makes it clear that we can be content in just having food and
covering. If these truths do not direct your efforts to provide, then you will
be caught in the trap of materialism and coveting will lead you into all sorts
of evils.

There are couples that live together but remain unmarried because it gives
them a financial advantage in taxes or income. There are many more that
purposely disobey God’s commandments and compromise their moral convictions in
order to take or keep a job. There are even more that fail to keep the
priorities God has set for the family in order to pursue gaining lots of stuff
in the false belief that is what it means to be a man and provide. Men who work
60-70-80 hours per week consistently and unnecessarily and often have their wife
working too in order to have a big home, luxury cars, fancy meals, exotic
vacations and lots of toys and gadgets. What your wife and children need is you,
not the abundance of stuff you can provide. Live in a smaller home with less
stuff, drive an older car, eat simply and provide your wife and family with what
they really need – your sacrificial love, time and godly leadership. That is the
true role of a husband.

KIDS CORNER

Parents, you are responsible to apply
God’s Word to your children’s lives. Here is some help.

Young Children – draw a
picture about something you hear during the sermon. Explain your picture(s) to
your parents at lunch. Older Children - Do one or more of the following:
1) Write down all the verses mentioned in the sermon and look them up later. 2)
Count how many times "husband" is used. Discuss with your parents the role of a
husband in marriage and how it can be carried out.

 

THINK ABOUT IT!

Questions to consider in discussing
the sermon with others. Why are our family and work relationships dependent upon
living as those who are raised up with Christ? How should a person live on earth
if they are looking forward to Christ’s return and the new heavens and earth?
What are some of the activities and attitudes we are to put aside when you
become a Christian? What are some of the activities and attitudes you should put
on when you become a Christian? Why is marriage so important? Who defines
marriage and what is that definition? What can be said about any attempt to
change that definition? What is the role of the wife in marriage? What will be
the response of most women if they know their husband truly loves her? What will
be the response of most men if they know their wife respects him and willing
follows his leadership? How effect does the curse of sin have upon marriage and
why? What kind of love is the husband to have for his wife? Examine Ephesians
5:25-33 and explain the three commands & examples concerning how a husband is to
love his wife? How should a husband respond to his wife when she does not
fulfill his expectations / desires? Why? What is the purpose of marriage
according to Ephesians 5? Why does Paul command husbands not to be embittered
toward their wives? What are the sources for such bitterness? 1 Peter 3:7
commands husbands to live with their wives in an understanding way – according
to knowledge. What does this mean in practical application? What does it mean
that the wife is a "weaker vessel"? How should the husband grant her honor? A
husband is to lead his wife as her head – what does that mean in practical
terms? Whose authority is the man under? Holiness is a key area of leadership
according to Ephesians 5:25-33. Give some practical ways in which a man can lead
his wife in holiness and dangers from which he should protect her. A man is also
to provide for his family – 1 Timothy 5:8 – while that includes the material
needs of life, why is provision more about trusting God than about how much
money you make? What are the dangers of materialism in seeking to provide? What
is more important to your wife than material goods and comforts? What are the
most important things a godly husband can provide?

 


Sermon Notes
3/20/2011

The Role of the
Husband – Colossians 3:19

Introduction

    Our relationships with one another are dependent on living
as those who have been raised up with _____

    Put off the _____________ and his ways – Colossians 3:5-11

    Put on the ______________and his ways – Colossians 3:12-17

    Colossians 3:18-4:1 – family and work _________________


The Importance of Marriage

    _________________ is the foundation of the family and
of society

    The quest for _________________ fulfillment is
antagonistic to godliness and detrimental to society

    _________established marriage (Genesis 3), only He can
define it and the roles of the husband and wife

The Role of Husbands

    If a husband will ________ his wife it makes it easy for
her to respect and submit to him and vica versa

    The curse of sin and its innate ____________makes it
difficult for husband and wife to fulfill their roles


Love - ajgapavw / agapa̫ Рthe love that
arises from the will and ___________itself for the good of the other

    Ephesians  5:25 – Husbands, love your wives just as
_______also loved the church and gave Himself up for her

    Ephesians  5:28-29 – So husbands ought to love their
own wives as their own ___________

    The love a husband gives to his wife will be to his own
_____________

    Ephesians  5:33 – each husband is to love his own
wife even as ____________

    To love your wife as God commands will require
_____________ on your part


Not Embitteredpikraivnw / pikrainô –
disagreeable, harsh, ____________ , angry, jealous.

    This command is a contrast to love – and is applied when
the proper roles are _______ being fulfilled.

    A husband who does not love, even momentarily, can become
selfishly ___________or be provoked to it

    Ephesians 4:31-32 – bitterness is part of the old life
that is to be ____________

    1 Peter 3:7 – "live with her according to knowledge" –
your wife is to be your life ____________

    Titus 2:3-5 – older women are to teach younger women how
to __________ their husbands

    Women are declared to be a "weaker vessel" – most likely a
reference to her _____________ makeup

    The husband is to grant her ___________ – being a "weaker
vessel" is not being inferior


LeadershipEphesians 5:23; 1 Corinthians 11:3

    The husband has a responsibility to __________ his wife as
her head

    All men are under the authority of and accountable to the
_______Jesus Christ – including non-Christians

    A leader is responsible for ________decisions made under
him – including those of his wife and children

    A primary role of leading is to direct the wife and family
to ___________- Ephesians 5:23-24

    The _______________ of an unequally yoked husband is even
more critical

    Leadership also encompasses responsibility for
____________ from physical danger and moral evils.


Provider1 Timothy 5:8

    Provision is more about trusting the ___________- Matthew
6:33 – than how much money you make

    1 Timothy 6:8 – we are to be ____________with just food
and covering.

    The quest to provide material things can become the trap
of materialism and ____________

    Disobedience to God’s commands or failure to keep His
priorities only leads to ______________

    What your wife and family needs is _________, not the
abundance of stuff you can provide.

    ______your wife sacrificially, give her your time and
godly leadership – that is the true role of a husband


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